Serious Inquiries Only

I waste a lot of time looking through ads on Craigslist. One thing I’ve noticed is that an awful lot of the ads – whether they’re for things like furniture, artwork, cars or real estate - include the phrase “serious inquires only.” Some folks are pretty adamant about that as you can tell from the fact that they either capitalize the whole phrase or use lots of exclamation marks. On the one hand I kind of understand why they put that in – they’re probably just trying to cut down on spam email – but on the other hand it kind of bugs me because it sounds like a threat

Anyway, I was reading through some real estate for sale ads yesterday and saw one that sounded pretty good, but included that phrase in capital letters and with about five exclamation marks. So I just decided to send off a quick and chipper response:

Hello. I’m contacting you to inquire about the property that you have advertised for sale. The thing is, I’m NOT serious. Not at all. Not in the slightest. In fact, I’m just messin’ with you. Usually I’m a pretty nice guy, but today I just felt like being a dick. Have a pleasant day.

Regards,
DF

That’s all.

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I’m not much on death and destruction. In fact it’s a big downer. Yet I don’t mind featuring The Killers on Our Duncan Funk Song of the Day. Curious, eh?

Title: Read My Mind
Artist: The Killers